Day 26: Disappointment. It sucks.

So, I'm yet to really delve into my love life. Probably because I don't really have one. But, there was once this boy, and he made me laugh, and feel special, and made my tummy do little flutter things, and I couldn't help but smile when he called. It was weird, because I'd known him awhile before this started to happen, and was kind of surprised when it did. And, in true BJ and Lindsey fashion, it was the worst timing, as I once again was in the midst of picking up and moving my life. I don't regret the move so much as I wonder what could have happened had I stayed. I tried to take the attitude that if it was meant to be, it would one day be. And, when we stayed in touch, I remained hopeful, but tried to keep that hope at bay, because it hurts too much when you're let down from the picture you've painted in your mind. Life just won't let you do that. It won't let you stop your feelings from forming, and it won't stop getting in the way of the somedays and the maybes and the if onlys... I may have tried to keep it casual, never really putting out there how I felt so that there was no pressure, and things remained uncomplicated in what could become a complicated situation. It's no one's fault, but I am sorry for that. What was I afraid of? Why do I let that fear keep me from expressing myself? You truly do live and learn and this was a hard life lesson.