Days 298-305: 2nd Annual Sea Isle Extravaganza

Here we go, we've done it again. 5 girls, one beach house, endless possibilities. After a first trip to the lovely town of Sea Isle, complete with greeting the sunrise on the beach, taking the town over that night, popcorn store managers and cage fighters, and a sendoff into marriage for one of the five, it would be hard to top the first annual extravaganza! But alas, we came through. Unfortunately, we had cloudy skies and some rain, so beach time was out. But there was plenty of wine sipping, face stuffing, girliest of girl talking and of course, there was dancing! I find it hard to believe I've only known these fabulous ladies for year, because of the absolute terrific time we have together and the ability to completely be ourselves. This may be the last year of my twenties, the last year to really get away with being "balls out" crazy, but girls, you have really helped me do 29 some justice.
Thank you for making me the 5th member of the foxy ladies, for listening to me babble, for making me laugh so hard I pee a little, for never judging, for bringing me Diet Coke while I'm hugging the toilet bowl, for sympathizing, boosting my spirits and just plain being there when I need a friend. We know how to party, but we also know how to be a stand up friend. I'm a lucky girl, and I can't wait to see what the next decade brings for our group. Well, maybe I can wait just a bit...I don't want it to go by too fast! Here's the 3rd Annual Sea Isle Extravanganza and many more to follow!

Day 297: Happy Mother's Day!

I know I frequently give kudos to my mother for her love and support and encouragement throughout my 29 years. But on this Mother's Day, I'd like to give an extra special thank you to the woman who I try to model myself after. Mom, you've been there every step of the way, pushing me to leave behind the comfortable and venture out into the unknown to follow my dreams. And while it's been a rocky road, one that's come with just as many lows as highs, a few tears and a few more smiles, I wouldn't change it. So thank you Mom, for pushing me, for comforting me, for listening to me, for reprimanding me, for cheering me on, for everything. I've become my own woman, but a huge part of me is you and I'm proud to carry that on. I only hope I have a daughter one day to teach and raise and be there for the same way you have been for me. I love you and thank my lucky stars I got you when they were assigning mothers on July 16, 1981. :)

Days 290-296: I'm tired.

Another week, another 5 days of stress, sleeping during the day, and eating lunch at "breakfast" time. I'm just tired. Drained. Exhausted from thinking, from not thinking, from wishing for more, from settling for less. Is it a girl thing? Do we like to visualize the future, or is it more preparing for potential curves in the road? Am I thinking TOO much? Or am I thinking the right amount? Do I want too much by wanting more? Oh boy, when do the answers come?

Day 289: I said it...and now I'm even more scared.

I thought I could fall for him when he surprised me with a night of dinner and Christmas lights to brighten my crappy week. I thought I might just love him when he gave me my first real Valentine's day, surprising me a day early with flowers and pizza and diet coke and bagels. I knew I loved him when he told me he'd not only showed up after almost 3 weeks away with flowers, muffins and watermelon gum...but that he'd vaccuumed. I almost said the words without even knowing they were going to come out, but I stopped myself. Why? Because I was scared. Scared he wouldn't feel the same, or not say them back, or say them but not mean them, or be completely caught off guard or, or...I don't know. But, scared as I was I knew I had to say those 3 huge little words or they would come flying out at the most inopportune times...which is exactly what happened. After days of working up the courage to say them at the perfect time, I blurted them out during a tense conversation about our futures and where our relationship was going and yes, even some tears. I mean, I shouldn't be surprised, it's classic Lindsey. And, despite the unfortunate conditions, it was finally out there, I'd laid it on the table and he'd responded with the same feelings, the same words. But, now what? How do we say it again? When do I say it again? It's almost more scary now! Now I feel like it's just hanging out there, taunting me, do I say it now? Or just keep biting me tongue waiting for him to say it next? Good grief, Charlie Brown, why don't they tell you it's going to be this hard?

Day 283-288: This is going to get better when?

Ugh, another crazy week, complete with severe weather and a royal wedding! As if it wasn't enough doing another week of producing 2 hours with no help, I got to deal with tornado warnings on Thursday, keeping us on the air all morning waaaay past our end time...and then it seemed like I'd just got home, when I had to return for Royal Wedding hoopla on Friday! Now, I may have originally said I could have cared less about Will and Kate's nuptials, but once the national coverage started I was hooked. So needless to say, it was a bit of a distraction as I tried to put together my shows, which fittingly enough were full of wedding counter programming. Once I pulled my head out of the British clouds and got my shows finished, everything was smooth until some silly blow up with my director. I really let it bother me, even though it was Friday and not a huge deal and I know I should have just shrugged it off. I'm too darn sensitive! I could feel the pressure of the tears and I had to will them away...enough of this! I will toughen up and not let these little things hit so close to home. I will give it right back and hold my ground when I think, when I KNOW I'm right! That being said, thank gooooodness this week is over.